Note:  This is an older Las Vegas trip report that I am posting for the entertainment of Las Vegas addicts and anyone else who loves fun.  It was written back in 2008.  Most of this information is now outdated and some places mentioned no longer exist.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Las Vegas today!!

I made a last minute decision that I did not want to lug my suitcase first to work and then to the airport.  So I went to work sans suitcase and announced I was leaving at 3:00. I ended up leaving at 1:45. I went home and sat on my couch all antsy about come on let’s gooooooo already.

Finally it was time to get in a cab to go to the airport. On the way there I saw the moon – man was this thing big. I heard on the cab radio that this was the closest the moon has been to Earth in fifteen years. I decide to revisit the Moon Dance. This is something I read about a few years ago on the Atlantic City message board. When there is a full moon, you go outside with an empty purse.  You hold it up and say “bring me money” as you turn three times (either clockwise or counter clockwise? I could not remember so I did it both, which probably cancelled out the good luck.) I also looked like an idiot doing this at the airport in public.  But I don’t particularly care about looking like an idiot so I was all good

JFK was dead dead dead dead dead. So being that I had only about three people ahead of me at security, I was there way too early.

I am flying JetBlue. They now charge $2 for skycap. I really didn’t need to use this since the airport was so dead but I did anyway just because I’m so used to it that I didn’t think about it.  Once I’m through security, I notice JetBlue has a new food court. You can get custom made sandwiches, other sorts of hot food, there is a salad bar, they sell LOTS of snacks and then there is the mother lode – ONE LITER BOTTLES OF DIET PEPSI. Oh JetBlue, I missed you.

My flight is supposed to leave at 5:30.   It doesn’t. In my little notebook there are pages of me ranting and whining and bitching and whiiiiiiiiiiiiiining about every minute I am not in the air. I’ll spare you reading all this.

Finally we are on the plane. JetBlue is REALLY roomy. I think I have forgotten this because I have not flown them in a very long time. We sit at the gate for god knows how long (all electronic appliances and cell phones off please!) I watch television and they are “interviewing” Marley from Marley and me and he is eating the microphone. Aw. They end up having to reset the television because some of the sets aren’t working. Then you have to sit through all the ads that are a new addition since I’ve last flown JetBlue. Finally it’s all back on and CNN tells me its 7:54.  We are still sitting at the gate. Still sitting at the gate. Still sitting at the gate. We move ten feet back to sitting at the gate. Finally they announce we are 9th to take off. I’m shocked we have a single digit; I’m usually in the 20’s. Finally at 8:20, we take off, three hours late. Whew.

During the last 20 minutes or so of the flight, this incredible pain starts up. It feels like someone is taking a needle and shoving it through my eyebrow and upwards. The pain is so sharp and it’s as thin as long as a needle. It keeps growing and we get to where I start heaving and I think I am going to throw up from this pain.  This has NEVER happened to me in my life what is this pain??  It goes away as quickly as it comes and I am all fine and better.

We land at 11:30. I go to get my luggage and it’s not there yet so I smoke. Come back in and my luggage is still not there. Go back outside to smoke. Start getting REALLY antsy. Go back in, STILL NO LUGGAGE.  But this time I realize that there are also no people waiting for it. This is weird. Did they make an announcement that they were moving our luggage to a different carousel? Nope. They had apparently already unloaded all the luggage and everyone (except me) got theirs so mine was taken to the JetBlue booth. Already? That quick? What? No wait for luggage and I missed it because I thought it hadn’t come out yet?  Sigh.

I am supposed to take the bus to my hotel but instead I opt for the shuttle. As always, I am the first one on and have to wait forever and then I’m the last one off. While waiting I wrote in my notes “I could very easily go to bed right now. Remember this later after you have no money and wish you had used going to bed as a way to preserve your budget”  Do I know myself or what?

Finally – the shuttle leaves. Twelve hours after I left my apartment, I arrive at the California hotel.  I get room 1901.  It’s a handicapped room. I am not handicapped (physically, I may be mentally though) and I don’t need this room.

I walk in and the bathroom light is on, the keys from the last guest are on the dresser and the window is open. I figured out later that the bathroom light was on because the light bulb when you enter the room is blown. Not too sure about why the window was open, it’s cold out. I take a minute to write my notes to reiterate again that I should go to bed but instead I’m going out.

I head downstairs and hit the B Connected player’s card booth.  Now that Coast casinos and Boyd casinos have combined, I need to get my Coast points combined with my Boyd points. The woman at the booth was very mean and told me I needed to go to the Gold Coast. I refuse to believe this. She tells me it’s true, I need to go to the Gold Coast because my Gold Coast card is inactive. Lady, don’t even. I played there four months ago. It’s not inactive. My Coast points showed up online TODAY as 25,000. I left my home twelve hours ago, it’s close to midnight, I am cranky, don’t even try and tell me I need to go to the Gold Coast to do something I know you can do for me. She swears she can’t do it; I need to go to the Gold Coast.

OBVIOUSLY I am not going to go to the Gold Coast.  Instead I go to the Fremont and hit Dunkin Donuts. Back to the California to play.

You know how you arrive in Las Vegas and it’s all you have ever dreamed about?   You are finally there.  You start playing and it’s so exciting but you just keep losing? Then you begin to fear your entire trip is going to be like this? Not wins that you give back, but NO WINS EVER? That’s what this night was like. I almost give up but then try an Easter Island slot machine and turn $5 into $25. This is a good sign since I used an Easter Island themed change purse to do the Moon Dance when I was at JFK what now seems like 17 years ago.

I cashed out and went to a ticket redemption thingy and found a dollar in the tray.   Woooooo. I need to eat so I get on the ridiculous line for the Market Street Café.  Keep in mind that this ridiculous long line is taking place at like 1:00 in the morning.  Unbeknownst to me, I had accidentally borrowed Mac King’s Cloak of Invisibility.  The server overlooked me three times when asking people “How many in your party”.  She takes two parties before me.  To be fair, it’s a complete zoo over there.  I finally get her to hear me when I yell “HELLO, I’M IN FRONT OF THEM”. I am seated, I have the Eggs Benedict. My review is “meh”.

I go back out and play a Treasure Chest video poker machine and lose.  I try a Goldfish slot, lose. It’s day one and I’ve gone through my budget for two days in just a few hours. Hate.

I’m done, let’s get out of here. I share the elevator with a couple who realize this elevator doesn’t go to the floor they wanted to go to. Then they realize the floor they want doesn’t even exist because they aren’t in the right hotel. They are drunk and find this hysterical. I do too.  I hit my room at 3:15 am – feeling like crap both physically and mentally. I decide to not set the alarm and sleep alllllllllllllll day tomorrow. I am here for 21 days.  I can do this.