My last morning in Naples.  I wanted to spend a few hours here before leaving for Rome.  Especially since I have now mastered the fine art of not being murdered by a Vespa when crossing the street.  (Hint:  walk with a local in between you and the direction of oncoming traffic.)

Naples chaos:

After a last game of catch with the cute dog who lives at my hotel, I was off.

I took the subway to the Montesanto Funicular (I LOVE FUNICULARS.)

This funicular was inside though, so I didn’t get that cool outside view that makes me love funiculars.

From the funicular, it is a short walk to Castel Sant’Elmo.  Even I did not get lost.

This castle is an odd thing.  It was completely dead.   I saw maybe 20 people tops the entire time I was up there,  which was weird since this is the view:

Naples is a madhouse.  Any time you are outside, you are on the verge of being murdered by a Vespa.  The sound level on the streets is unlike anything I am used to.   The sound of the Vespas, combined with what seems like never ending sirens (likely from emergency vehicles tending to pedestrians who were murdered by Vespas) is so nerve grating. This is coming from a New Yorker mind you.  So being up on top of the world surrounded by peace and quiet, while gazing out at beautiful scenery was fabulous.  I can not get enough of combining gorgeous views with independence flavored self pride at having gotten myself to this very spot.  LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEE I GOT HERE ALL BY MYSELF!!!!

So of course it is hot out, it is May in Naples.  I came prepared with 100 spf sunscreen.   However I am now beginning to wonder if I am allergic to the sun because any time I go outside in it, I end up clawing my skin open to stop it from itching.  I don’t even know if you can be allergic to the sun.  All I know is that my face and hands are basically black and I can not stop clawing at them.

While up on this roof burning and clawing away at myself, I stepped into this lookout post:

AH COOL AIR!  The temperature in there was at least thirty degrees cooler than in the sun.   I never wanted to leave.  Unfortunately (and OF COURSE) despite the fact that there is pretty  much NO ONE UP HERE AT ALL – I mean come on, look at these pictures, look how there is NO  ONE UP HERE:

As soon as I find solace in my cool lookout, a family comes up and the kids want to come in and play in the fort.  MY fort.

Ugh.

The kids aren’t even being obnoxious dicks about it.  I only know they want to come in because they ran up to the fort and stopped in the entrance when they saw me.  They both apologized and stepped out.

It was so nice in there, I was cooling off, it felt so great.  I tried standing with my back to the entrance.  Oh hey kids, I can’t see you, la la la la laaaaaaaaaaaaa.  But I knew they were out there.  They were simply waiting quietly, pretending to be busy with other things.  Never whining, never melting down, never anything.  At first I intended to hold my ground.  MY fort, MY FORT YOU STAY AWAY.  But as the time went by, I had to wake up and face the reality that I am a 41 year old woman going completely out of her way to prevent a couple of well mannered kids from playing inside a cool looking fort that is really more suited for their age than mine.  SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.  Time to go.

I walk back to the funicular…oh hell no I don’t.  I walk and get lost looking for the funicular. I actually end up back at the castle.  Oh here we go.  Let me try that again.  This time I find the funicular, coming from the complete opposite direction I had left it from.  Oh hey, what’s that?  OH HEY – underneath the bench outside the funicular is a cough drop and….MY FLASH DRIVE.  They both must have fallen out of my bag when I left the funicular.  I cannot believe that (a) I lost my flash drive and (b) I found it.  All my pictures are backed up on there.  Not even just from this trip, but from every trip I have taken in the past year, including all of last year’s Euro extravaganza.  I also have all my budget information and daily reports (like the one I am typing right now) backed up on there.  I cannot believe how lucky I got that I spotted that on the ground.

My time in Naples has come to an end.  I think if I had visited the castle on day one, it would have made my trip so much different.  I spent the past couple of days viewing Naples as a place you visit because it’s a conveniently located place from which you can easily visit other places.  I didn’t really view Naples itself as a stand alone destination.   I wish I had spent one more day there.  But when I booked my trip, I didn’t know I would love Naples.  I also didn’t realize I would hate my next destination, which is Rome.  (Spoiler alert:  I hated Rome.)