Once upon a time, I was in Chengdu, China. I was going to visit the Grand Leshan Buddha. I get on the bus and it is hot and smells like a homeless person. Shortly after, it begins. I hear some girl talking loudly on a cell phone. “There are no backpackers on here, only Chinese people and they all smell bad.” I shrink down in my seat a bit. It is one thing to not wish for human companionship ever, it is another to hide from someone who is rude enough to have said this aloud. Don’t assume that no one on the bus can understand you. I’m betting a bunch of them could.
We get to the town of Leshan and I make the mistake of not immediately running off the bus. I get caught. “Hi! Do you want to share a cab?” No thank you, I am taking the bus. “I will take it with you!” Argh, fine. We walk to the bus and she is joyously telling me how happy she is to have found me. Me? I don’t want to be found.
There is a thing about meeting people while traveling. That thing is that I don’t want to. Let me make this clear: I know I am the odd one here. People who want to meet other people? They are normal. YOU are normal. You should be glad I don’t want to spend time with people. Who wants to spend time with a weirdo? Go on, run off and be free!
Whenever I do meet someone, the internal dialogue starts.
Me: Ughhhhhhhhh
Me: Would it kill you to just be nice to this person?
Me: No, but I just don’t want to talk to anyone
Me: But would it kill you to just be nice to this person?
Me: But a huge part of this trip was to escape the real world and BE ALONE
Me: BUT WOULD IT KILL YOU TO BE NICE TO THIS PERSON?
Me: I DON’T WANNNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Continue reading →