Monthly Archives: April 2014

Even When in Las Vegas, Television is Life

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Tuesday, April 30, 2009 – Day Seven of Eleven

[This is part seven of an eleven part trip report.  If you want to start at the beginning, go here.]

I get woken up at 7:30 am at the California, by a very useless text.  I can’t fall back asleep so I go out and get breakfast at the Golden Gate coffee shop.  And I lose $100.  I’m all crabby because I touched those stupid tails-pennies I touched last night and now I’m losing AND it’s only 9:12 am.

My notes now have me confused, as I was writing them I swore I broke THREE one hundred dollar bills to fund my degenerate gambling but it seems I was only missing two.  This is really not a bad thing to confuse I suppose.

I lost some of that money on Supertimes Pay.  I don’t know what else I lost it on.

I played Treasure Chest video poker at Fremont and got dealt a straight flush.

I did not cash out.

Oh and since I’m in degenerate, I play FIFTY CENT Treasure Chest video poker after losing my straight flush win. Thankfully, after moving down, I got some full houses that brought me back up and I snapped to my senses and cashed out even.

I head back to my room at 11:00 to shower and nap.
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Las Vegas Trip Report: One of Many Days I am a Degenerate Gambler in Las Vegas

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Wednesday, April 29, 2009 – Day Six of Eleven

[This is part six of an eleven part Las Vegas trip report.  If you want to start at the beginning, go here.]

My trip is officially half over and very unlike me; I haven’t been obsessing about this every day.

I am up and out at 8:19.  The slot club here at Golden Gate does not open until 9:00 so I can’t give them my Las Vegas Advisor multiplier yet.  I figure I’ll have breakfast first.  I have about $50 in comps here, so here it is I shall eat!

The Golden Gate diner has a menu item named Snickers Hot Cakes, which are pancakes with Snickers baked in them.  Sounds delicious.  It turns out to taste just like regular pancakes, only every now and then you get a mashed up peanut in a bite.  Disappointing.

I go to pay and give my card to swipe as I’ve done in the past.  This is when I’m told they don’t do that anymore.  You have to get a comp slip.  Excuse me, what?  I ate here BECAUSE I have comps and I can’t use my comps?  I am told “Well you can go to the slot club and get one.”  No I can’t because they don’t open until nine and it’s not nine yet.  Then I start whining and I cut myself off because it’s not her fault so why am I whining at her.  Then she goes on to say that this comp system is actually really great.  I ask her “If it’s so great, then why am I paying for a meal when I have over five times enough comps to cover it?”  She didn’t have an answer for me.

Again, I make myself stop talking because it’s not her fault at all that this is the new system or that I was unaware of it.
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Las Vegas Trip Report: That Time I Got a Room With a Mirror on the Ceiling

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Monday, April 27, 2009 – Day Four of Eleven

[This is part four of an eleven part trip report.  If you want to start at the beginning, go here.]

I wake up at the El Cortez, I am out at 8:10 am.  Breakfast is at Cafe Cortez.  I am exhausted.

I play that penny diamond progressive I found the day before (or two days before, I cannot keep track of days in Las Vegas) and I lose $20.  I play video Keno in one of those really old school coin dropper Keno machines.  I turn $40-$50.  See?  I’m writing stuff down better!

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Las Vegas Trip Report: The Day I Hit a $626 Progressive Jackpot

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Sunday, April 26, 2009 – Day Three of Eleven

[This is part three of an eleven part trip report.  If you want to start at the beginning, go here.]

I wake up at seven at the El Cortez, I am out at eight.  I have a $75 budget for this morning.

I use my Las Vegas Advisor 3x points coupon at the El Cortez. I should have used it yesterday since I ended up playing a bunch, but I didn’t plan to play a bunch.  This is how it goes though; you never can tell when it’s a good time to use these things.

My notes are absolutely AWFUL.   They say “Invaders From the Planet Moolah $60″.  Sixty what.  Did I put sixty in or did I take sixty out?  Hello?  THE PURPOSE OF TAKING NOTES IS SO THAT YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU WON OR LOST YOU IDIOT.

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Las Vegas Trip Report: Video Poker With a Wheel Showdown

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Saturday, April 25, 2009 – Day Two of Eleven

[This is part two of an eleven part trip report.  If you want to start at the beginning, go here.]

I wake up at 9:00 at the El Cortez. I am out at 10:00.

Viva Monopoly = $0

My progressive quarter Double Double Bonus video poker machine – This is MY machine because I won $300-something on it back in December and I love her – gave me $0

I first stop at Dunkin Donuts for iced coffee and then head over to the Las Vegas Club to scout out video poker with a wheel.  On the way, I stop at the slot booth to activate my 2x points coupon.

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Las Vegas Trip Report: The One Where I Purposely Choose A Crappy Room Because I am an Idiot

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Friday, April 24, 2009 – Day One of Eleven

Today I left work early and headed for the airport.  I am on a US Airways flight pretty much only because I forgot they charge a luggage fee.

I arrive at the airport and check the departures.  Sure enough, my flight is already showing a delay.  This happens every time.  Every time I am told it’s because I’m leaving during rush hour.  Well this time I have photographic proof I am cursed.  Do you see all these flights?  Also leaving during rush hour?   DO YOU SEE that the ONE flight that is delayed is mine? Do you?  DO YOUOUOUOUOU?!?!?

delayUgh.

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Travel to China: The One Where I get my China Visa

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Holy Crap how did the time fly by so fast?  I leave in a month?!? I am NOWHERE near ready to go.

On Friday, I went to get my visa.  What fun that was.  Way back when I started planning this trip, I knew nothing about China visas.  Because you know, why would I?  So I decided to ask my friend Google for help.  I dove right in and asked him about applying for a China visa in New York City.  I came across the Yelp page for the China Embassy in Manhattan and I knew I was doomed.  It seems the Manhattan Embassy is well known for being the toughest one to get a visa at.

Allow me to copy and paste:

  • Do not go to China. It’s not worth it. Plan to go to the Consulate at least 5 times. They are rude and are scamming.
  • They make you type your application and will make fun of you if you did not.
  • Power hungry little men.
  • Seriously awful human beings. Security guards harass and condescend you, the people behind the counter are automatons without a shred of human sensibilities or dignity and with all the senseless bureaucracy, it’s woefully inefficient. China is a large and complex country with many merits but this place is a conglomeration of all the bad points concentrated in one building.
  • This place makes me want to drown puppies. The website has an expired form and useless/incorrect instructions, the office doesn’t carry any forms, the hours are inconvenient and the location is terrible.
  • It’s a sad, sad day for US-Chinese relations when grown Chinese men with US passports walk away from the visa application window fist pumping in joy, having had their visa applications accepted.
  • I was there today. I waited in line and watched a clearly frustrated Caucasian man storm away, muttering, “I’ve been here three f*cking times already.

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Las Vegas Trip Report: March 29, 2002: Last Day

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Note:  This is an older Las Vegas trip report that was written back in 2002.  Most of this information is now outdated and a lot of what is mentioned no longer exists.  

Friday, March 29, 2002 – Day Six of Six

My mother and I wake up at 7:00 and check out of the Barbary Coast.  We went to Paris for breakfast. This was my first time eating at their buffet and it definitely will not be my last. So good.

I lose some more money in Paris. I only have about $70 left on me.

We take a cab to the Hard Rock and I lose $5. I ask my mother “Do you want to look around” meaning “Do you want to look at the memorabilia”  She says “yes” and starts looking at the slots. We play The Price is Right and I win $50 – which I really needed.

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Las Vegas Trip Report: March 28, 2002: The Day I Accidentally Smashed My Head On a Slot Machine

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Note:  This is an older Las Vegas trip report that was written back in 2002.  Most of this information is now outdated and a lot of what is mentioned no longer exists.  

Thursday, March 28, 2002 Day Five of Six

We wake up at the Barbary Coast at 7:00 am and go over our breakfast options. My mother is starving and doesn’t want to walk far. I agree to eat next door at the Flamingo only if she promises not to put any money in any machines. She agrees and we go.

They have a brunch in the morning so you can have breakfast or lunch. We stuck to the breakfast. Their buffet is actually very good. It’s too bad I now hate that place with a passion. We had a window table and spent our time watching the flamingos outside.

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