Last day of this Las Vegas trip report WAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I start my day at California hotel in beautiful Downtown Las Vegas I had set my alarm for 4:00 AM but it turns out I set it for 4:00 PM instead of AM because I am a fucking asshole. I did wake up at 6:00 AM though and am out at 6:41 AM.
Love the cotton candy sunrise!
Over to Circa I go for overpriced iced coffee at Jackpots. I have some of my offer credit so I got some weirdo VERY expensive candy bars to use all of it. I keep stocking up on these just to use the credit. I need to find an alternative.
I lost $300 on Buffalo. Oh so it is going to be one of those last days, eh? Come on Buffalo, it is my last day. be nice.
I found a penny on heads and put it in my bra. Let’s see if we can turn this around.
My next stop is Fremont for Dunkin Donuts iced coffee. I am going to miss this.
My notes say I collected my cashback from Binions. Good thing I keep notes because I definitely do not remember doing this. I must not have planned to come back anytime soon. Joke’s on me because I am going back shortly after posting this monstrosity!
Breakfast is once again at Binions Café using an app reward. I still have one left. I just couldn’t do it all. I even had one I let expire because I just could not keep eating here. I need to be less of a cheap fuck.
I go back to California and play on the second floor, quarter Double Double Bonus video poker. I get 7s on the draw.
I lost some, won some, lost some more and then hit Aces. YAY.
I lost $100 in Buffalo after this. WHY MUST YOU.
One more shot at dollar Double Double Bonus video poker to remind myself why I don’t play dollars. Bye bye $100. Can’t I just have one last fucking win.
Time for the airport. I lost $140 smoking before my flight. Wonderful.
I flew home on JetBlue Mint, first time ever flying this from Las Vegas. I don’t know how I am going to go back to sitting next to people in normal seats. I may have to go back to when I used to travel to Vegas only once a year and thereby that justifies spending way too much money on Mint seats.
When I got to JFK, I noticed there were Christmas decorations. Did not notice this on my way out because I was too busy yelling at that asshole who took my bag at security.
In the time it took me to write this, my blog got hacked a few times. I then had to move servers and spent 2 days in fear that I lost the blog forever. Then I did lose the blog. Then I got it back and lost it a few more times. It seems to be fine now except that photos take years to upload. You have no idea how fucking annoying it is to type out a post and lose your momentum uploading photos. It can take a full hour to upload photos from one post. And no, I cannot work in a separate tab because I have to sit here x’ing out all the error messages. Or else it won’t keep going.
/whining
I have one more report to get up before I return to Vegas this month. Crossed fingers I don’t lose my blog again.
Thanks for reading!
thanks for posting such an entertaining trip report. I follow along as though I am there with you. I rejoice in your wins and feel the pain of the losses.
Awesome trip report as always. Sorry that I took your bag at JFK. I just wanted to take a selfie with your stuff dog =)
When in July will you be in Vegas? I have my trip scheduled from 19-23rd and flying basic economy because that’s how I roll. Since you love the strip views so much how come you prefer staying in Downtown instead?
Thanks David! Sorry your asshole is so black 🙂
I arrive on July 30.
The Strip is so gorgeous but something has to pay for those bright lights and billion dollar views. I usually do better with gambling Downtown and food is half the cost.
I had a long run of zero stays on the Strip. I’ve finally developed a good flow with splitting the trip.
Thanks for reading and best of luck to you on your trip!
another great trip report and I am excited we may get more trip reports after your July trip…I really laughed at the story of the airport guy….I am glad he wasn’t on your flight – you may have gotten thrown off the plane for fighting …. hate days of nonstop losing, but we’ve all had them…I wonder how many burgers you had this trip…hopefully when you go back in July the dining situation will be better. thanks for taking the time to write all this…
Thanks Nancy!
I am really hoping the dining situation is better. I’ve already made some reservations, over a month in advance. Sigh
Long time reader, first time commenter, long time fellow degenerate. I was going through withdrawal, thank goodness the Shakespeare of Vegas Trip Reports has returned. If comedy equals tragedy plus time, your description of ass-crack asshole is comedy gold. I give this report eleventy billion stars!
Thank you Phil! I am wondering if I can tier match those stars at any casino? 🙂
Oh how I wish I could let my words and feelings fly like you do! Bravo for posting your blog and entertaining me, can’t wait until the next trip!
Thanks Cathie!!
isnt it nice to not have to wear masks any more unless riding the bus? been to the new casino at resorts world? i can download the comps i earn in their poker room right into the slot machines and at least the video blackjack there gives points.
I haven’t been to Vegas since the mask mandate was lifted. I didn’t mind wearing them though. Quite a few times I forgot I had one on when I got to my room and I would attempt to light a cigarette and realize duh, mask.
I will be visiting Resorts World on my next trip for sure. Very excited to check it out.
I want to get back to Vegas in the worst way, but I’m not doing it until table minimums come back down, restaurants are more normal, and Main Street Station is back open. If I want to play $15 and $25 tables, I can just drive 45 minutes to AC or 15 minutes to Philly.
It really sucks, too, because I could easily afford to go with a decent budget, but I’m not going if it isn’t any different from being home.
You are not alone there, that’s for sure. I keep going because everything else I want to do is on hold. Sigh.
I worry that the days of $5 minimums downtown are over. Hard to believe $5 was the norm for many downtown and off-strip properties just two years ago.
I was wondering if you made it to Vegas! I always enjoy your reports. Thanks for taking the time to post!
Thanks for taking the time to read it!
I don’t recall when you posted this, but I just found it a few days ago at LV4E. When I read about your technical problems, I kind of understood why I never saw the email notices I thought I had signed up for. I also thought maybe your were mad at me for some reason, but it’s all fine.:)
As always, a great report on a fun time. Yes, you had your rough spots along the way, but it was still a great trip for you and a fun read for us. I’ve said it before, but your sense of humor and outlook on life in general is really something else. Thanks for another epic time and all the best to you on your next trip.
Yep, the email notifications are mysteriously gone. Could not turn them off when I tried, can never figure out how to get them back.
Glad you found it though!