The beds at Red Rock are so comfortable.  I had my longest night’s sleep here.  I could have slept many more hours, but I need to eat and skedaddle as I am in Las Vegas and I have plans today.

First stop, Player’s Club to get my free MyVegas buffet loaded.  The line for the buffet was so long.  It is every time I come here.  It honestly is no wonder they discontinued their relationship with MyVegas.  Quite frankly, they don’t need it.

I play around a bit but I am short on time as I need to be on the 11:00 shuttle.  When I originally planned this trip, I was going to take the airport shuttle to the airport, and switch over to the Green Valley Ranch airport shuttle, as I am staying there tonight. However this changed slightly when I decided to get my hair done.  I am overdue for a Keratin treatment and my roots are insanely imitating what they looked like back in the 80’s.

Since I have been traveling so much, I didn’t have time to get this done before I left home.  I don’t really have time to get it done when I get back home.  So why not get it done in Vegas?  I will either be curbing a gambling loss, or preserving a win by being out of a casino for a few hours.  Right?

I had booked a Groupon for a place that was super conveniently located at the transfer point between the 201 bus and the 111, which is the bus that goes directly to Green Valley Ranch.

I step outside to get the shuttle and it is pouring rain.  This is normally lucky for me, but not today.  Not when I am getting a Keratin treatment.  You cannot get your hair wet for 72 hours after.

I make it to my hair appointment, completely soaked.  I get Keratin treatments every three months or so, to have perfectly straight hair. I am a Groupon superfan and am always going to different places to take advantage of the discount.   It needs to be said that this is the best place I have ever gotten it done.  I have never gotten a bad treatment, I have never had results come out different.  But what made this the best place ever was that instead of just sitting in a chair for two hours, Annette put on a movie for me to watch.  The most simplistic touch made the time fly by.  I cannot recommend this place enough.  She did a great job, she was the nicest woman and the time flew by.  If you are ever going to get a Keratin treatment in Vegas, I cannot recommend Annette enough.  You can contact her at: 1.702.542.3949.

When I was done, it was still pouring rain outside.  Annette suggested I take an Uber, I suggested no.  She helped me get my hair into a plastic shower cap to prevent it from getting wet.

I venture outside with a plastic shower cap on, and my hoodie over it.  You can still see the shower cap on my forehead but honestly, I don’t give a shit.  What is going to happen when complete strangers see me in a shower cap in public?  If anything, it will discourage strangers from talking to me, right?

WRONG.

I make my way to the 111 bus stop.  There is a guy there, looks to be in his mid-late 20’s.   He is doing something on his phone.  Then he turns to me and starts telling me he doesn’t know what to do about his girlfriend.  She doesn’t trust him, always wants to know where he is.  I give some sort of response like “sucks dude”, thinking he would spot my magical “DON’T TALK TO ME” shower cap.  But maybe because it was clear, he didn’t spot it and kept talking.

The bus is never coming, this I know.  It is just not possible that a bus is ever going to show up on a day where it is pouring rain in the desert, on a day when I cannot get my head wet, on a day when any stranger is talking to me, on a day when a stranger is talking to me when I have a shower cap on in public.

Since we are going to be there awhile, I start to give him real advice.  You know, if she is acting like this, it is because she has no self esteem. She is going to keep accusing you of cheating and she is going to keep on telling you that you are going to leave her.  And when you decide you have had enough of the accusations, you ARE going to leave.  Then she is going to yell “I TOLD YOU SO” behind you.  Without ever realizing people don’t leave because she isn’t good enough, people leave because she keeps accusing them of wanting to leave.

She needs to work on her own issues, because those are what is causing this rift.  It is up to you how deep into that  you want to go.  She is going to take any suggesting that she needs to work on herself, as proof that you don’t care about her.  She will feel like you are saying she isn’t good enough and needs to change.  Those are HER issues, not yours.

How can you have a relationship with a person when all they do is push and push?  She is going to continue this self destructive behavior.  It is going to grow and grow and every person who dates her after you, is going to have escalated the pattern.  Do you really want to live your life like this?  Do I really want to be sitting at a bus stop in the rain, wearing a shower cap on my head, giving you this advice?

Then comes more life’s problems.  This guy’s family is constantly criticizing him for how he spends his money, how he smokes weed, etc.  But he has a job and supports himself so why do they care?  Well Guy, consider maybe not having such a close relationship with these people.  They can only know about you, what you let them know about you.  You do not need to share every detail of your life with your family.  For your own sake, cut them back a little bit.  If they are criticizing you for stuff, don’t let them know about that stuff.

Is that a bus?  No?  FUCK.

He listens to me and then starts having some sort of fit.  Physical fit.  He walks away as his body begins jerking around seemingly uncontrollably. NOW the bus is coming.  I almost want to yell “The bus is coming!” so he doesn’t miss it, as he is pretty far away now.  I really don’t because come on now.

I get on the bus. close my eyes, and “wake up” at Green Valley Ranch.

It is still raining, I am still wearing my shower cap.

I have visited this property a few times, but this is my first time staying here.  The layout is kind of odd.  Most casino hotels have the hotel built on top of the casino.  Green Valley Ranch has the hotel built on the same level as the casino, but separated from the casino. What this basically means is TOO LONG TO WALK.

It took me awhile to figure out where the hell the hotel check in is.  As I am finally approaching it, I reach under my hood and pull off my shower cap and discard it in a trash can.

At check in, the guy confirms bed type and smoking preference. I tell him I absolutely do not care about bed type, but I would like a smoking room.  He intently stares down, typing on his keyboard, looks a bit flustered and excuses himself.  I am left standing there thinking I will now have to beg for a smoking room. Third hotel in a row!  Can Degenerate Gambler be declared as some sort of mental handicap that requires me to have a smoking room so that I do not lose all my money smoking a cigarette?

The guy comes back and tells me that all their smoking rooms are “out of service” but he got the okay to upgrade me to a balcony suite, so I can smoke outside.  Sweet!  But it is raining and I cannot get my hair wet and I threw out my shower cap.

I am in room 2021.  I step off the elevator and see this helpful sign.  Oh my room should be….um?   I look at the room number again.  Look at the sign again.  Why does this sign not have 2021?

I take a gamble and walk towards the left and find my room.  This is a really nice room.  If it were not raining, I would love to sit out on my balcony.

I drop my stuff off and head out.   I am on the second floor, and so is the casino.  I just have to walk to the end of the hallway and enter another hallway through this door.  At the end of THAT hallway is the casino.

My first stop is Starbucks.  It is literally located in the absolute furthest place it could be from my room.  I get a Venti Peppermint Mocha and start to gamble. It has been several hours and I am fiending to go.

I start at Ultimate X video poker and get this baby:

 

Followed up by every degenerate video pokers player’s dream.  It’s legal name is “Multi Strike Super Times Pay” but we all know it by it’s street name, which is Crack.  This game is so hard to find.  As a matter of fact, I have only seen it one other time in my life, at the El Cortez.  I am stoked as all hell to be playing it again.

If you are not a video poker player, you are probably skipping this paragraph but I am going to keep typing anyway.  The idea of this game is that there are four hands.  If you win, you move up a line.   Each line has a multiplier.  So you want to (a) get to the top line and (b) have a big win up there.

I get this son of a bitch on the top line. Four to the Royal.  With an 8x multiplier. If that Queen had been a Jack of Diamonds, I would have won $1600. HATE.

I cash out and move on.

I was all over this casino looking for the Cleopatra Keno I had played on my last trip here.  I could not find it.  I then decide to find the entrance I took last time, thinking maybe that would help me getting a better grasp of where to look.  Still nothing.   I got distracted by a Buffalo slot machine and played that for awhile. I love this game and all the versions.

Then some video poker where I had a win:
Soon I am out of cash and starving.  I went to The Grand Cafe for dinner.  It came to $12.98 and I comped it.  Then back to my room.  It has finally stopped raining but since my balcony does not have anything over it, the furniture was completely soaked through.  Oh well…

Gambling Day: + $80
Gambling Trip: – $30
Miscellaneous: (water, Starbucks, tips, including tips for my hair): $96
Comps used: $12.98 dinner at Green Valley Ranch
Coupons: Groupon for my hair – does this count?
Freebies: Free night at Green Valley Ranch, calculated on the rate showing the day I booked it = $175.87 via MyVegas (this includes room cost, tax and resort fee, I paid zero), free buffet at Red Rock via MyVegas = $6.99 (x two since it was for two, + tax), $10 meal at Binions from the Motherlode promotion.

Today’s itinerary:

Thursday, December 22, 2016
Breakfast: Red Rock 8-11 MyVegas
Check into Green Valley Ranch
Hair: 1:00
Lunch:
Dinner: Green Valley Ranch 4-9 $14.99 comps/ $18.99 half off LVA