Las Vegas Trip Report: The One with Vomitor and Public Urinator

Sunday, December 1, 2013 – Day Six of Eight

[This is part seven of a ten part trip report.  To start at the beginning, go here.]

This morning I woke up with my alarm at 9:00.  Figures that I am finally actually sleeping on a day I have to be up to check out.

Today is Free Play Day  I will be using all the free play I have saved up and I will win a bazillion dollars with it.

I am out of my room at 9:45.  Breakfast is at The D Grill,  Although today is now December and I have a second $25 dining voucher, I choose to use my comps just in case i want that $25 for later in the trip.  Spoiler alert:  I don’t.

After eating, I go to Starbucks.  Then back to Fitzgeralds to use my $50 free play for December.  I attempt to start on the machine that gave me quad aces yesterday, but it does not accept free play so I lose $20 in cash.

I play around on various slot machines.  Lightning Jackpot helps me turn my free play into $50 in cash.  I go back up to my aces machine and lose $20 of it.  Why can’t it just love me forever?

I get back to my room at 11:45, check out is at noon.  It is only now that I realize that internet is free for comped guests.  I did not know this and had stopped using it when my first 24 hours had run out.  I am mad at me for not knowing this.

I call the Bell Desk to have them come and store my luggage for me and off I go!

First stop is the El Cortez.  I have $10 here.  I am also supposed to have some more via using the ATM and doing the ATM promo.  But I don’t need to go to the ATM so I skip that part.

I try my $10 in an Invaders From the Planet Moolah slot.  It won’t take free play.  I am positive I have used it on this machine before.  They have also moved this machine so it was hard to find her.  I play cash and lose.

I play Cleopatra Keno and turn my $10 into $10.

From here, I hit Binions.  My $10 from the Las Vegas Advisor coupon book gets me zero.

Las Vegas Club – I have $10 free play here.  $5 from Las Vegas Advisor, $5 from American Casino Guide.  While I did lose here, I also won because I found the Cleopatra Keno machines I could not find the other day and thought they were gone forever.

Plaza. I have $10 here, $5 from Las Vegas Advisor and $5 from American Casino Guide.  Zilch and zilch.

This is not how Free Play Day is supposed to work guys.

Next up is Four Queens where I have $10 free play with the Las Vegas Advisor coupon book.  This nets me $25.  When I go to cash out, the machine eats my ticket and then flips out.  Someone came to fix it and tried to hand pay me $45.  Yes, I did correct her.

I stop back at Binions for lunch.  I paid $.37 after clearing out my comps.

Over to Fitzgeralds to use some more free play here.  I already did the $50 with my mailer, but I had turned in a coupon yesterday from the Las Vegas Advisor that got me $5 free play for every 50 points I had played in the past 24 hours.   It turned out I had $20 free play on my account so I collected that.  How much did I get from it?  ZERO.

I am out of downtown free play but I just have to play Double Super Times Pay at the Fremont before leaving. $40 cash gets me no cash.  This is so unfair.

I collect my bag from the Bell Desk and get on the bus to go check into the Riviera. I am not sure at this point if I am sleeping here, or at the Orleans, where I am also booked tonight.   Both are convenient and both are inconvenient.

I get room 2014.

Riviera Las Vegas room 2014

WiFi is free here.  It also blows.  It may be the slowest WiFi I have ever had.  In the bathroom, there is a cigarette in the toilet and the only toiletry is half a bottle of shampoo. This is not the first time I have been a victim of shoddy housekeeping here.  My favorite time remains the time there was no toilet paper and no tissues in the bathroom.  Nothing.

Despite this, I decide to stay here.

I am out at 6:45.  I use my Riviera $10 free play that came with my offer and turned it into zero.   Why has Free Play Day forsaken me?

I take the Deuce bus to transfer for the 202 to hit the Palms and Gold Coast.  I really won on the bus.  Some man had a bag full of PUPPIES.  He also had the mommy in there.   So cute.  I wish I could have taken pictures but the bus was so packed that getting into my bag was an impossibility.

I got to the Palms and collected my $40 free play from  I played a slot machine named “Sinbad”.   I never saw it anywhere else. It is the greatest game ever.

There are two machines side by side.  A woman is playing one, a man is sitting at the second one, not playing.   I ask him if he minds if I play it and he does move, but is mad about it.  Suck it.

I then show him by winning and winning and winning.  I am playing $.80 a hand, his girlfriend/wife is playing $2 a hand.  I am hitting the bonus nonstop, with high bonuses.  She is hitting it rarely and getting low bonuses.   Take THAT.

I get all the way up to $90 and decide I will play down to $70.   I did not want to stop, but I have to.

I then take the remaining $20 free play and play four card keno. I get this up to $50 and cash out at $40.

Over to the Gold Coast.  I have $10 free play here from Las Vegas Advisor.  I lose it, but it does last a while.  I have a coupon for a free buffet for 200 points and I am at 150.  So I play (and lose) with cash to get the remaining 50 points and collect a voucher for a free buffet, good until the end of the year, which is like now.

I take the free shuttle from here to the Orleans.   I have two free play coupons here.  $10 from Las Vegas Advisor, $5 from an offer.  They let me use both in the same day, but I have to do them one at a time and go back to the booth between each one.

I check in to get my dining credit.  I am given room 1724.  It has no “do not disturb” sign which is a HUGE pet peeve of mine.  It had a great strip view, but my camera is vain and only wanted herself to appear in the pictures.

I collected all the toiletries since I will need them for the Riviera and left.

Back downstairs, I eat dinner and use up my $10 dining credit.   I ordered peach iced tea.  It was not good.  For some reason, the servers could not stop bringing me more.  There was no point where I did not have less than two full glasses on my table.  They kept bringing me more and more.  I felt like the episode of Impractical Jokers where Murr keeps handing the guy pickles nonstop.  Finally I think the insanity is going to stop since I have now been given my check. Nope. I am brought another full glass, set down to my already still filled glass, and a to go cup so I could take it with me.

I stopped in the Orleans gift shop to stock up on slippers and THEY DIDN’T HAVE THEM ANYMORE.  OH NO.  I NEED SLIPPERS DAMN YOU.  Look at how cute these are:


I have none left and I wanted to replenish my stash on this trip and I’ve now been slipper blocked.  OH THE HUMANITY.  LIFE IS PAIN.

I play the last of my free play on a Family Guy slot machine.  I win ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS!   Woo!  I got the bonus so many times.  I wanted to keep playing but I knew I would not stop if I got too low.  So I cashed out at $96 so I would have a single to give to the shuttle driver.

Even though I am supposed to continue onto Hooters to finish Free Play Day, I just do not want to.  I am tired.  So I go and wait for the shuttle back to the strip.

This whole thing confused me.  I walk outside.  There is a very young girl waiting for the shuttle.  I would have guessed her age at around 20.   There was a group of three also out there, two dudes and one girl.   One dude was vomiting in the trash can.   The girl was wasted and asking me a million questions, where am I from, etc.   I kept giving her monosyllabic answers, she kept not taking the hint.  Finally she and the vomiter go inside to buy cigarettes. The third dude takes this opportunity to piss on the side of the casino.

He gets back before his drunken friends.   Now that young girl gets herself into the mix.  She offers to the pisser that she loves Bud Light, but prefers vodka.  She then takes out a bottle of vodka and they begin sharing it.   Vomiter and his girl come back out and all four are pounding the vodka.

The entire time we are on the shuttle, the four of them are partying it up in the back.  I can hear the young girl give the pisser her phone number.   He looked homeless by the way.   Then again, so did I.  

He ends up giving her his number as well and tells her to call him later.  She wants to hang out now though.  Sorry, but he has business to take care of with vomiter and the girl.

Around this time is when vomiter vomited again, on the shuttle.

The shuttle used to stop at the Barbary Coast, but now stops at Ballys.  All the way at the back, where the monorail is. I considered taking the monorail back to my hotel, since I have a free ride via playing the My Vegas game on Facebook.   But I still have to go to Hooters tomorrow since I did not tonight.  So I will save my free monorail ticket until then.

I walk through Ballys and Paris to the bus stop.   I waited about 45 minutes for the bus.   I did get to take this picture while waiting though.

bellagio night

Finally the WAX bus shows up.   But at this exact moment, so do the vomiter, the pisser and the girl.  Only now the pisser’s face is completely soaking wet.  I don’t want to know why, ever.  I just know I do not want to get on the bus with them.   So I don’t and wait back for the Deuce.

The Deuce comes and some guy will not stop eating on the bus, despite multiple warnings from the driver.  So now the driver pulls over and will not go any further until the guy exits the bus.   This took some time.

FINALLY I am back at my hotel.  Isn’t my hotel so pretty?

Riviera Las Vegas night

Riviera Las Vegas

The Las Vegas RTC has also FINALLY corrected the bus stop sign outside:

Riviera Las Vegas bus stopIt had been misspelled for years.

riveria bus sign

I play some Family Guy.  This is the worst Family Guy machine in all of Vegas.  It was giving me NOTHING.  Finally I hit a bonus, Lois’s Hot Spins.  This is my favorite bonus because every time I have hit it, it paid well.   As soon as I hit it, the machines goes black and stays black.  Of course it does.

This takes a while to get fixed.  Once it does, the bonus resumes and I get like under one dollar.  Fuck you Family Guy machines at the Riviera.

I then put a final $20 in the progressive quarter Double Double Bonus video poker machine and hit quad tens.  Cashed out with $80.

I am in my room at 1:30.  Did some ranting in my notes about how the stupid internet here doesn’t work and I cannot get on any website.   Then I suppose I went to sleep.

Here was today’s itinerary. Meals were switched up (I never once entered Main Street Station this entire trip) I skipped Hooters and I did not need to return to Ellis Island since my free play which was to be available within 48 hours the other day, was available (and lost) immediately.

Breakfast: Main Street Station buffet – free with 250 points (ACG)
El Cortez $10 freeplay (ACG)
Binions $10 freeplay (LVA)
Four Queens $10 freeplay (LVA)
Las Vegas Club $10 freeplay ($5 ACG/$5 LVA)
Plaza $10 freeplay ($5 ACG/$5 LVA)
Fitzgeralds $50 freeplay – mailer

Lunch: Fitzgeralds $25 dining credit mailer
Check into Riviera
Riviera $10 freeplay – mailer
Hooters $20 freeplay ($10 ACG/$10 LVA)
Orleans $5 freeplay mailer
Orleans $10 freeplay (LVA)
Gold Coast $10 free play (LVA)
Palms $40 free slot play coupon
Dinner: Orleans mailer $10 dining credit
Ellis Island $10 freeplay (ACG)

Want to read more?   Here are parts  eight, nine and ten!

9 thoughts on “Las Vegas Trip Report: The One with Vomitor and Public Urinator

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