Las Vegas Trip Report: Ever See a Chick Passed Out at a Slot Machine?

Thursday, November 28, 2013 – Day Three of Eight, Part One of Two

[This is part three of a ten part trip report.  To start at the beginning, go here]

This morning I am up at 5:30 am at Aria, ON PURPOSE.  I plan to go to the Bellagio and get some pictures of the conservatory before everyone else is awake.

I leave my room at 7:00 and stop at Starbucks for a Green Tea Frappucino.  I love these things so much.  They are something I don’t allow myself when I am home because indulging as much as I would like to, would cost me the same amount annually as a round trip flight to Asia.  Stuff like that is so crazy.  So if you are reading  this with any Starbucks item near you, and you have ever said to me “I wish I could afford to travel”, please take a moment to stop to add one plus one.  It really does equal two.

I walked through the “back way” from Aria to Bellagio.  This is a sculpture of canoes.  Yes.  Canoes.  No, I don’t know why.

Aria Las Vegas canoe sculpture

Have you ever seen Ocean’s Eleven?  The scene where Julia Roberts walks down the grand staircase?  Would you like to see a picture of the staircase?  Of course you would.  Here you go:

Bellagio Ocean's Eleven staircase

Oh wait, that’s right . The staircase isn’t there anymore.  Because Las Vegas does not like to keep anything we love.  Except of course, our money.

I am so not used to being in Las Vegas for Thanksgiving.  I stopped that so many  years ago when I realized that I was paying double airfare to go for Thanksgiving and then again for Christmas.  So I stopped the insanity and just started making my December trips twice as long.   This entire trip, I was constantly being surprised with “wait, it’s NOVEMBER?!?”

Yes,  you idiot.  It is NOVEMBER.  A point that surprised me when I saw the Bellagio was still set up for Autumn. (Note, this is actual Thanksgiving day, a notable date.  And yet still a shock to me that it was November)

Bellagio Conservatory Las Vegas NevadaBellagio Conservatory Las VegasBellagio Conservatory AutumnBellagio Conservatory Atrium

And of course, obligatory Bellagio Chihuly glass sculpture photo:
Bellagio glass ceiling

And the registration desk:
Bellagio reception

I will never stop taking the same pictures over and over and over, every time I am in Las Vegas.  YOU CAN’T MAKE ME.  YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM!

As I was walking through the casino, I spotted this amateur passed out on a slot machine.  I really regret taking a picture instead of video.  You can’t hear how loud she was snoring in this picture.  I also regret not checking to see if she had any credits in the machine.  No, not to steal her money.  But because I would really like to know if she passed out while playing, or if she was just walking through the casino and had to stop and take a break.

amateurI wonder how long she was there/how long the button depressions she is molding into her forehead lasted after she woke up.

I played around for a while.  Then I said “fuck it” and decided to put in last night’s winnings.   Where are last night’s winnings.  I SAID, WHERE ARE LAST NIGHT’S WINNINGS?!?



I thought I had kept last night’s winnings separate from today’s budget.  I didn’t.  I had them in my wallet with today’s budget.   And I have already lost them.  Without even realizing.  Because I am a degenerate gambler.



Moving on.

Here is another picture I take every trip.  It’s not just a picture of Paris.  As I have mentioned, I have a tradition where I wake up ridiculously early to get pictures of the conservatory before everyone else wakes up.  Every time I take the Paris picture, it is still insanely early.  Everyone is still asleep.  My trips are winter trips so it’s cold outside this early.  It is so QUIET. I am the only person up there.  I love love love love love standing up on the Bellagio “balcony” and just staring out at the strip, daydreaming about what my day will bring me.  This is my Las Vegas moment.

Paris from Bellagio


I go back to my room at Aria to check out.  Today I am moving downtown.  YAY.  I LOVE DOWNTOWN.

I checked out and was happy to see I was not charged a resort fee.  WOO!  That gets me back $58 of this morning’s losses.

I took the Deuce bus downtown to my next hotel, which is Fitzgeralds. If you have never been to Vegas, then you may be unaware that “just across the street” is never  “just across the street” when you are speaking about anything on the Las Vegas Strip.

In order to get from Aria to the bus stop right across the street,  I had to walk through Aria to get to Crystals mall.  Then through the mall to the other side (of the mall, not the street, we aren’t even outside yet).  Over here there is an escalator that goes up to a pedestrian walkway.  Go up, walk on the pedestrian walkway to the pedestrian bridge to cross Las Vegas Boulevard.  Once on the other side, it’s just a quick elevator ride down and then a tiny bit further to the bus stop.  That is right across the street from where I started at the beginning of this paragraph.  The best part of this is that I am not being sarcastic when I say I was pleasantly surprised at how easy that was.  Getting around on the strip in Vegas can be a nightmare.

The Deuce bus is a double decker bus that runs on the strip to downtown.  You can pay $6 for a two-hour pass or $7 for a 24 hour pass. I buy a two-hour pass since this is all I need since I am never going to leave downtown today.  All I have wanted since I got here was to be downtown.  I love downtown.

At this point in my day, it’s only noon.   This day’s report is already pretty long.  So I will take a break here and continue today’s report in my next post.

Want to read more?   Here are parts four, five, sixseven, eight, nine and ten!

6 thoughts on “Las Vegas Trip Report: Ever See a Chick Passed Out at a Slot Machine?

  1. Mary Ann

    Lovin’ it so much that I’m getting to read a current Jen report — never thought that was going to happen again!

  2. Pingback: Las Vegas Trip Report: Thursday, November 28, 2013 – Day Three, Part Two | i put my life on a shelf

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  4. Pingback: Las Vegas Trip Report: I Hate Seth MacFarlane. | i put my life on a shelf

  5. Craig

    BTW – just to let you know, we had to remove the stairs, because they really didn’t go anywhere and were a security issue, as you could walk right into the Spa from the staircase… Contrary to any belief, the Gallery was never located there – I took the painting and we reinstalled it in the new Spa (entirely on the 2nd level now – the Salon is on the 1st/GF in its entirety) – the origins of the staircase being there was that the original plan for the executive offices including those for Steve, were to be up in that location (the patio off the men’s locker room was supposed to be originally off his office) – however, when space was needed for the Spa, all the admin/executive offices were moved up front behind the main reception area – which logistically makes more sense regardless.

    1. jenniferjennifer Post author

      Thanks for the explanation! It never made sense to me before. I picture hoards of disappointed visitors looking for THE staircase. Now it makes sense.


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